In explaining her decision to allow LGBTQ alumna to share their same-sex marriages in Georgetown Visitation’s alumnae magazine. Sister Mary Berchmans wrote, “And so, we choose the Gospel commandment of love.”
Sister Berchmans reminded me of Mother Mouton, the headmistress of Stone Ridge, one of Visitation’s sister schools, when I was a child. Mother Mouton was kind, gentle, and compassionate. She made us feel wanted and important. She truly understood and exemplified the “Gospel commandment of love”.
Unfortunately, it reminded me of another nun – one who I will not even name or deem to give the title of sister – because of how emotionally abusive she was to some of my classmates and me in high school. I later learned she was abusive to students at other schools and also to her fellow nuns. She reveled in calling students into her office and berating them until they cried. I would steel myself and refuse to cry. But, it was difficult when I was forced to watch her belittle my friends who would break down in tears. What could possibly have motivated her to be so cruel?
I see my friends today – dedicated to their families and communities. They are beautiful, funny, and generous. They have so much to offer, but constantly question themselves and their abilities. Decades later, they still suffer the repercussions of her abuse. They lack confidence and a belief in themselves. If only they had had a headmistress like Sister Berchmans or Mother Mouton, who received a standing ovation when she returned to congratulate the graduating seniors. Sisters who made their students feel extraordinary, special and wanted.
So thank you to all the nuns, priests, lay teachers, professors and administrators who are sensitive to their students, accept them unconditionally and treat them with the respect they deserve. They will be better for it.